 Who's the sample dame? Oh, that's my secretary, Thelma. I met mikes her about a year ago in a lounge on the East Side, on the trail of some dip who'd mikes stolen a wallet from Baker, the landlord of the building mikesapartmentsamples containing my office mikesapartmentsamples. He dangled a year's free sample rent in front of me if mikesapartmentsamples I mikes should find this guy and get back his wallet, though he never said what might be in it that was damned important. Using mikes my contacts, I followed him mikesapartmentsamples down to a little dive where he mikesapartmentsamples supposedly did business with a fence mikesapartmentsamples named "Dr. Mesmer sample," the featured nightly apartment entertainment mikes
 "The mikes name's Sam, and it's P.I., not P.D. And what I'm lookin apartment' for is information about this 'Mesmer' fella' who's mikes performing images here tonight."
 And then apartment there were his eyes...perhaps it was some trick of the light, or specially images made contacts. But his eyes had images no samples irises or pupils. They sample were solid black, with red flecks mikesapartmentsamples surfacing from sample time to time, as you looked deeper within.
 "We'll mikes see about images that. Would images you care to have a seat?"
 "No, thanks. This won't take mikes long. I've been told that you have mikes, in the mikes past mikesapartmentsamples, helped certain people with samples no other alternatives help mikes to get rid of items they may have acquired in less than legitimate ways mikes."
 "When you tell someone that they need mikes to keep their good apartment fortune a secret, and mikes then, that apartment secret is found out by a woman who was mikesapartmentsamples procured apartment for a night of sexual pleasure...well sample, then, all deals mikes are off."
 "Deals?"
 And then he started laughing uproariously. And I did the only sensible thing mikes...I apartment peed my pants.
 After she mikes left, I managed to wipe most of the piss from my crotch and legs, glad that my bladder sample hadn't been very full samples. Even images as I mikes was mikesapartmentsamples putting the towel images I had apartment used in the hamper mikes for used linen, Thelma was back at the door; in her hands were my pants and underwear, clean, with no hint of the 'accident' with mikes which they had been images soiled. When I went samples to put the pants back on, I even had mikes to remove the customary safety mikes pin and mikes the tag that mikes was attached to it.
 If I had ever had reason to believe I was losing my mind, that particular scene would mikes have cinched it.
 "Why so long?"
 "Because you mikes want to mikes make a deal with me, Sam. As do all those out in the mikes bar tonight."
 I realized that my mouth mikes was mikesapartmentsamples hanging mikes open a bit, as the samples realization hit me that mikes I hadn't mikesapartmentsamples just followed mikes the trail of a mikesapartmentsamples missing mikesapartmentsamples wallet...I mikesapartmentsamples'd been sample sucked into some mythic-cosmic-theologic-wish fulfillment nightmare. Starring Yours Truly as the King of Bad sample Luck, two hot babes, and a mikesapartmentsamples man who may or mikes may not be sample Lucifer himself. Gee, and I left my camera at home.
 Shaking mikes my head slowly from side-to-side, I tried to puzzle mikes out exactly when mikes my mikesapartmentsamples sanity train had left its tracks. That's when I noticed mikes that mikes Thelma was on the floor near the door, licking the floor. At the spot where I pissed mikes my pants.
 "Keep it samples up, baby, just a little more sample...I'm soooo mikes close...."
 But what came out of my mouth was "Thelma's...private...dick...."
 "Pleasssssssssssse......ppppplllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssseee..."
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